6. My Break

For whatever reason, I stopped blogging. Not a huge deal considering I didn't really make a habit of it to begin with, but I've decided to start back again. So, yay! :D

Life for me has gotten very complex lately...

A month ago, my grandpa Bill died of Alzheimer's disease. We all knew it would come sooner or later, but I guess we never expected it to be so suddenly. It's a terrible feeling to lose someone you love so much, but that's life. Sometimes, life isn't fair, but that's simply how it works.

I finally got out of the slump that I was in, but that doesn't fix all of my problems. I suffer from some very drastic mood swings sometimes. One moment I'll feel super happy, but then find myself in a dark place again. When this happens, I tend to amplify my emotions and sometimes it ends up upsetting the people I'm around. As a result of this, I ended up hurting people that I held close. Words can't describe how unbelievably sorry I am for doing this, but only time will tell if those people still want me around. All I can do is wait right now...

Enough of the emo stuff, though. Life's too short to dwell on the past and be depressed all the time. It's time to be happy and enjoy whatever twists and turns I may encounter on the road of life! :D

Hakuna Matata :)

5. Nursing Home

Ever wonder what it would be like to have a brain disease, but not even realize that something's wrong? I've always kind of wanted to know what that felt like without actually having it...

A few years ago my grandpa was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, and up until recently, it's been pretty under control. I'd never really known the effects of it till I went up there today... My grandpa Bill went from this lively old Air Force vet to an unstable, crippled, old man in just a matter of a couple years. This came as quite a shock to me, mainly because the last time I'd really seen him, he was completely healthy. It's almost like time came full circle for him; or any person with Alzheimer's at that. Like he went from being a baby, to a grown man, then back to being a baby again. He's even got people changing his soiled underwear, too. It was definitely a disturbing sight, to say the least, but I guess that's how life has to go for people in his condition. I think the most disturbing part of it all was seeing my dad and grandma's reaction to it. They kept treating him like a baby; giving him little noise makers to play with and sticking their tongue out at him. I may be wrong, but I think that treating someone like less than they are for an extended period of time would eventually rub off on them and somehow change the way they think and act. Like a baby... I don't know... It's a very touchy subject that I don't know much about. I just hope that grandpa has a great conclusion to his incredibly long and eventful life. I know he deserves every bit of it. :)

4. The Weather

"Sometimes I wish that I was the weather, so you'd bring me up in conversation forever. And when it rained, I'd be the talk of the day." :D

3. The Name

For anyone who may read this and for those who know me outside of this website, my screen name may come as a bit of a shock considering it doesn't really match my personality much, so I thought I'd explain it a bit before doing many more blogs.

First of all, a little back story...

When I was 12, my aunt married her now ex-husband Jack. During the entirety of their relationship, Jack was my hero. He and I shared all the same interests, activities, and most importantly, taste in music. One day I took a road trip with the family to Memphis, to visit the aunt and uncle. While I was there, Jack turned to me and motioned for me to follow him into his music studio where he gave me my first taste at what would become my absolute favorite band: Muse.

I can honestly say that the music of Muse has changed my life for good. They're not the typical alternative rock band that sings about the same crap all the time. Muse is good. No, better than good... Muse is AMAZING! No doubt about it! It's almost like every Muse song was written about a different portion of my life; like they've been secretly watching me for silent inspiration for their next incredible single. I know it's a bit of a stretch, but a guy can dream, right?!

Anyways, this brings me to my next part of the screen name story.

Late in my Junior year of High School, I met Mollie Price. She absolutely made my world light up with all sorts of different types of happiness and joy. Well, as with most High School relationships, this one didn't work out. It was an incredible two years experience, but when you want something else in a relationship, you have to go after it or you'll never be happy. I learned that the hard way, myself... Mollie will always hold a special place in my heart, but for now, and probably for ever, she's just a distant friend.

Well, I said all that to say this... My screen name is the name of one of my favorite Muse songs: Guiding Light. I feel that the lyrics of this particular song sum up all the feelings I've kept concealed since the day we split. This isn't to say I've still got strong feelings for her, but, like I said, she'll always hold that special place.

2. Rain

So, I'm sitting here, it's raining, and I've got my headphones in my ears with a random assortment of YouTube playlist songs blasting at full volume, so I thought I'd toss a blog up here. I'm still getting used to this whole concept, and it's still kind of weird to me, but I guess you'll never get over the awkwardness of it all unless you actually go out and do it, right? Right. So, I'm going to try to post a blog of whatever I'm thinking about up here once or twice (maybe more) a day.
Currently I have 3 seperate Facebook chat sessions, 2 people texting me, and my sister hanging over my shoulder, so, needless to say, blogging at the moment is getting tedious. But, I'm still at it, somehow...
I'm kind of running out of things to say for this one, so I'll check back when my mind wakes up a bit. :)

1. Pilot Blog

This is my first blog. I've always wanted to do this, but never really got around to it. I'm not entirely sure what to talk about, but I'll continue updating and posting more when I figure that out.